Another ride around the sun.
Here we are bebes, I’m another year older and I’d love to tell you that I’m feeling great about it. The thing is that with every year that passes, I find myself getting more and more depressed on the days leading up to my birthday. I’m sure the explanation has something to do with my life plan derailing so many times, but that’s a story for my therapist.
I hate that my 30th year didn’t live up to my expectations. I mean, in terms of my personal progress, because some may say that this past year was a bit too eventful in general.
Though the state of the world put a damper on my 30th year of life, that is not to say that it’s been completely uneventful. I did more writing this past year than I’ve done in a while. I finished a short film rough draft and a rough draft for my novel. What we’re not going to do right now though, is discuss how the editing of those two projects is going. Moving on.
This past year I have been let down by family that I held very near and dear to my heart. I left a job I was at for five years and started over in a completely new field. I let go of pain I’ve been holding on to. I’ve held my family together with sweat, tears and strength that I didn’t even know I had in me. I was let down by men. I set up proper boundaries with my father and the way I allow him to treat me. I have dealt with terrible bouts of depression and I survived it all.
As I clumsily step into another year, I find myself grateful for every year that’s behind me. 20-year-old Julie never thought she’d make it to thirty and look at me now! If you don’t look too closely, you’d almost think that I’m thriving.
Here’s to another year of tiny accomplishments. This is thirty-one!